Instead, I will tell you about the two gifts I have received in the past 24 hours.
#1. Sony Headphones
As Jonny has blogged about me on his blog, I will blog about him here. Last night I was watching Primer at his house- weirdest film ever, so I took the avenue of comprehension called Pinot Grigio Place (it was a cul de sac). We were clearing some stuff from his office and he just chucked these at me- how nice? I am a little bit in love with them, I keep looking at them happily. They remind me of the headphones in the George Michael video for Fastlove, remember them?
#2. The Letter From My Stalker
So, I will edit some of this letter out for reasons of delicacy, but when I came into work today, I was handed an envelope. It had a nickname of mine on it- a nickname that is synonymous with a guy who kind of has been following me around. Everyone has noticed. I have dealt with this badly- by hiding mostly...
Anyway, as I opened it, my heart started to pump again as I recognised the handwriting from one of my friends. Immediately realising they were trying to scare me again, I read my fake stalker letter.
If you think scary creeps are funny, well then.... it is kind of funny.....
"Dearest, most daring [Cat](nickname),
...(edit)Last night, I was gazing up at the moon and thinking of you and it occurred to me- guinea pigs are so erotic. It is no wonder that you have three of them. Although, as you are a Cat, it makes me wonder if you have ever wanted to devour them- as I have often dreamed of devouring you. Failing that, we could also find a handy meadow and run wild and free with the guinea pigs, naked as they are and only slightly less hairy. Let me know what you think.
Reply soon or...just or else.
Yours, always yours,
You know who. x
I work with a great bunch. ;-)
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