Old vs New

So I can't get too involved with details, but a very old friend has asked me to do something on a night that a newer but possibly more available and maybe better friend has also asked me to do something.  I think the old friend is staging some kind of intervention to the Berlin move (or at least will be expressing a small amount of shady caution)... and my newer friend is hosting probably one of the best nights of the year.

Old best friend wanting to share in my future, intimate night of talking, laughing and sharing, or new friend wanting me to share a big night in their life, marking a milestone of hard work and party.  Oh god.  And yes... I have tried suggesting an amalgamation of both....to no avail.

I know this doesn't sound like much of a dilemma, but these people both mean so much to me.  Either way, someone is getting let down and I hate doing that.

I'm also feeling really anxious about a whole other situation, but I will be letting that one keep for another day..  Possibly in another two days I think.

Treasure trove

So, I was just browsing through my phone, and came across a series of photos I forgot I had.  All of these have delighted me in different ways. Share?  Sure.  Belfast is raining, so I don't have much else to say....

Naturally.

Liverpool's Tate Modern.  I nearly passed out.  My alternate universe self must have created this.

My friend John had an accident (reality- I squirted a foul peanut milkshake drink thing over him) and then he had to walk about with this sexy stain.

On my way to a hen.  Dickish glasses, happy girl.

My friend Cazi in the olden days, a sexual octopus. As drawn by Eimear.

Hair as facial hair in Leeds

Some dawgs I hung with in Swindon this summer. CUTE.

Course, I don't expect these to delight you as much as they delight me...but sure.  Insight and context to the other posts I put up is good huh?

Adventure. Now.

So back to Belfast  Waking up this morning, I hear the familiar sound of tea cups clinking and toasters popping...and rain.

Depressing.  So I'm trying to keep positive about everything.  The move to Berlin, the fact that I met a cool vegetarian girl who needs a housemate, everything.  Things aren't that bad, but I just feel like I was wearing sparkles in Berlin and in Belfast I'm back to rags.  Its annoying that I think like this, because I do actually like Belfast.

So my plan is now to save, save, save and also to find things to do.  This Friday, I'm going to chill with one of my best friend's before maybe hitting up Gigantic.  They always play the best music, and this Friday is the 7th Birthday, so its a 007 James Bond theme. 

Apart from that, I need some targets. Adventure is required.  Cheap adventure.  Stat.

Germany vs Northern Ireland- A Song

So, Berlin.  Many many stories.  Met a lot of new people in a short amount of time, didn't sleep much- kind of my usual for Berlin.

In the meantime, I'm going to share a story which is both embarrassing and amazing.  Now, many other girls wouldn't share this tale, but I have decided the overall product needs to be shared and experienced by everyone.

So let me paint the picture.  Saturday night in Berlin, hanging out with a gang of lovely people.  The plan is, we're going to go to a short film festival, which one of my friends in Berlin has been involved in.  We turn up to the movie theatre, watch the films, then decide after to go to a party in a nearby collective co-operative space.  Its going to be an all night kind of a thing, so as my gang slowly drop off, my friend Francis distinctly says to me-

"Cat, now listen.  You are our only link to the Flea market, and so we need you to meet us again at 10.30am tomorrow morning."

"Yeah man, no problem, I will see you guys there.  Later!!"

Fast forward to the next morning, and I am hanging out at my friend Freddy's house.  I am late. Shit!  My battery is dead, so I use Freddy's phone to text Francis to explain the situation.  Next thing I know, Freddy is laughing a lot and apologising...

Freddy (laughing)- Yeah sorry Cat, I shouldn't have read that...

Me- Huh?  No its cool.

Freddy- No Cat.  Look again, I shouldn't have read THAT.

As I look at the message screen, up pops the message

 "Are you coming to the Flea Market, or are you still shagging?"  

Oh my sweet Jesus.  Despite feeling totally embarrassed, I'm laughing my head off.  We decide to reply and try to play them at their own game.

"Yeah, still shagging. But I won't join Cat to the flea market- it was the bomb, but also exhausting. Have fun."

Francis- "Good man yourself!"

We sent one more Northern Irishism (its coming up) before laughing once more at how funny this exchange of text messages were.  Next thing I know, Freddy has recorded a song (complete with me laughing in the background.)

This is that song.  

Narcopletic European... With Grammar Issues

Warning- this post is self indulgent sleepy pitter patter and there's a good chance ...I've... fallen..... zzzz.....

I'm freakishly punctual about airports.  Its not ok.  In terms of this blog, in terms of this reality, this now, for me... I'm screwed.  I am about 2 hours sleep deep. Which ain't enough baby....  Last night I didn't get much either.  I was giggling in work about this- in the middle of the night last night, I woke up to use the bathroom.  NEXT THING I KNOW- I'm waking up again, this time...on the toilet.  Yup.  I fell asleep on the toilet.  What am I, EIGHTY?!! Or....Elvis?!  (Although, he died.  Too soon?! I'm never sure about these things...)

So yeah- I'm basically scratching today as a win if-

a) I end up in Berlin by about 5pm

b) I don't find myself waking up.... on a toilet.

Also, I am travelling as a man.  Yep.  My friend who booked the tickets for me accidentally registered me as a mister, and when I went to change it, it was going to cost Euro110!  Eh...what??  Hopefully the boobs and butt will also count as qualification as a woman, not just a Ms on my boarding pass...  I have also already contemplated the "How-dare-you? I-am-midway-through-gender-realignment-surgery!" argument, but I think I have too much T&A to pull this off convincingly....

I can't wait for Berlin.  Someone just asked me what my plan was- I really don't know, but I'd like to get a little lost, by myself.  Its the best way to get to know a city.  And I know its not cool, in this world of social networking, but sometimes isn't it just nice to be alone, completely solo and independent?  The prospect of being alone in Berlin streets...yes.  I love it.  The city is rough around the edges, but so full of life and people and everything... there's so much stuff that I know I can slip in unnoticed as another tiny part of the bigger city.  Mood dependent though- sometimes I like disappearing, and then, yes, sometimes I like friggin' jumping in feet first and declaring myself to the street.*  Jesus Christ, I am glad I am me, because to watch me would be excruciating...

*totally hyperbolic.  I'm not that bad.  I would force myself to fall asleep on toilets if I was.

Disclaimer- I used a hell of a lot of ellipsis' (ellipsi?) in this post.  I'm blaming it on the lack of sleep.  I really am turning this thing into a stream of consciousness... ( <-- shit! I can't stop!!)

Don't deny a sugar high

SO.

I need to start blogging again apparently.  You ask, I deliver.  

Lets hit you with an UPDATE.


Online dramaaa
Yeah, lets discuss this.  Yesterday, I decided to update my Facebook page.  Fire in a new quotation, update my relationship status, etc.  Yeah, and?  Updating my Facebook Relationship status was easily one of the most mortifying things I have done this week.  I was single ANYWAY, but I went from 'Blank' to 'Single'.  Oh jesus.  Talk about cringe!  Even as I type this, one of my ex's has just commented saying- 'odear'.  Odear?  Oh dear I dated someone who doesn't realise oh dear is not one word.

Please everyone...do I need to release a statement?  Totally happy, not in a post break-up pit of 'Forever alone-ness'.  Ugh.  Jesus Christ.  


Work
Last night had my first night as a duty manager in work.  Theatre duty managers make sure people don't barf, and if they do, we get someone to clean it up.  It also has an element of sheparding to it- rousing the flocks to leave their drinking troughs and go to the dark barns. Being the theatre. Or something. Its fun though. FUN.  (At this early stage, its probably best to point out I have been chain drinking 'low-cal' hot chocolate drinks, and am on perhaps a little sugar rush.  I think low-cal loses its importance when you drink 6 of them in a row.)

It was good.  I felt like a part of me had died/my mum would be so happy, as I was wearing a sensible skirt with sensible flat shoes.  Now I'm all for flat shoes but WITH a sensible knee length skirt?  Colour me middle aged.  No thanks.  Happily though, I could spy my tattoo (recently acquired in Berlin) through my tights on my foot and felt that 10% badass still remained.  I had to film people after the show to ask them what they thought about it- I totally utilised the tricks that Come Dine With Me used on me- look encouraging, pull happy faces as if whatever the person is saying fills you with glee.  People see this and respond by talking more.  As someone who loves to talk anyway, seems I can make people talk a LOT.

I'm also doing more radio (1.42.00ish) these days.  I'm chilling out and becoming less like what I think they want to hear and more...umm...me.  Which probably means more babbling nonsense, but hey, if they paychecks keep coming, I ain't complaining.  Actually, on that note, one naughty show hasn't paid me, so I'm hoping that comes through this weekend as I am going to Berlin to....

Party.
Hells yeah bitches!!  Went to Berlin with aul Cazi the other week.  Had such a great time, I have decided to relocate there.  One small problem is that it seems like 5,000,000 other people have the same idea as me. Ah balls.  Applying for jobs remotely is difficult.  But I am confident it'll work out.  Somehow. 

This weekend, my friend Francis has arranged for a pile of his Europe based pals to get together in Berlin to party.  He wanted me to go- I couldn't afford it.  He offered to pay if I could get the time off work.... ummm.... I got the time off work.  Woo woo! I met and hung out with some people the other week that I'd like to catch up with, so hopefully that'll happen.  The Northern Irish ex-pats understand my euphoric nature, I think I might come off as a nut to the Deutsch though.  Ooops.  I have kept in touch with them on Facebook and Jesus Christ, I come off as mad bitch/horny devil/crazy lesbian.  Ok, ok, at times I can be the two former, (not the latter, sorry laydees), but I am actually just trying to sound enthusiastic most of the time.  Basically every time I hit 'Send', I die a little.

Happiness
Have you ever seen Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind?  You know that scene when Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet are lying on the frozen lake making up constellations?  He turns to her and says, ""I could die right now, Clem. I'm just... happy. I've never felt that before. I'm just exactly where I want to be."

I had this moment last night walking home from work at midnight.  Berlin this weekend, new adventures, just feeling happy.  I knew it wouldn't last - and it didn't, I didn't get the job I applied for and was told by email first thing this morning- but its good to recognise these moments huh?

Right. Chat later homeboys.